PERFORMANCES


The Long Pig

Dryuary

Bitchy Resting Face

Floss Boss

Don't Attack Me With Your Happiness

Ben kingsley

See Something Say Something

I turned you gay

Space In-vader

Clone U

Famous Baby

Girl Balls

Mock Bottom

Don't Attack Me With Your Cuntryness

Hypochondriac

God Wants You To Cum

Anal For Christmas

I Want To Be A Robot

Poison

All lyrics are written and owned by Kelly Dwyer

copyright 2011-2016 All Rights Reserved

 


The Long Pig

I love you so much
you make every day better
I'll adore you till the end of time
But if the world was ending
and the food supply cut off
I would eat you with a nice Chianti wine

I'd keep you alive so I could ration you out
I'd eat your toes and fingers first
cause of the solution was found
and we can both get out alive
missing toes and fingers aren't the worst

Did you know that
different colored people all taste the same? human meat is called "the long pig"
cannibals have given it a name

Don't look at me like that
I haven't thought this through
it just occurred to me because I am high
OK it's in my browser history
cause I was just trying to
Google if I should pan sear or fry you

Did you know that
different colored people all taste the same?
human meat is called "the long pig"
cannibals have given it a name

I ate the body of Christ because I grew up Catholic it doesn't seem like such a stretch if Jesus let me eat a minute saves my soul from Cyn please let me eat you, here sign this pledge

Did you know that
different colored people all taste the same
human meat is called "the long pig"
cannibals have given it a name

6 degrees from Kevin Bacon 1 degree from human bacon
6 degrees from Kevin Bacon 1 degree from human bacon

 

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Dryuary

 

Sipping on my coconut Lacroix (Lacroix)
Fancy whine, lemon wedge, curly straw (straw)
Acting like it's filling up the void
Don't analyze me like you're Sigmund Freud

Can't go to your party
Cause I'm tempted by Bacardi
Don't want to see your comedy show
Without a bottle of Cuervo

Dryuary
Not gonna drink for a month
Dryuary
gonna get myself together
Dryuary
hate hangovers much as I love getting drunk

Couldn't do December
Cause the holidays were bumpin
no sober October
cause I lost my job got dumped or somethin?

The summer is too hawt
So that ain't gonna happen
keg of the club month ended
No more keg stands no more tappen

That's why I'm rappin

Dryuary
Not gonna drink for a month
Dryuary
gonna get myself together
Dryuary
hate hangovers much as I love getting drunk

(Bridge)
Got big plans gonna work out every day
Gonna Volunteer, deep clean my place
Mean every word I say
Got big plans record an album and write my play
Gonna journal, learn to sew
To keep my drunk demons at bay

Dryuary
Not gonna drink for a month
Dryuary
gonna get myself together
Dryuary
hate hangovers much as I love getting drunk

I can make it to the end
Or maybe just until the 20th
with Donald Trump as president
my sobriety is precarious

 

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Bitchy Resting Face

Did you think I'd be a total bitch when you met me?
did you fear first encounter at the bar?
Did you say "hey is everything all right with you, or was that subtle road rage back there in the car?

Bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face
bitchy bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face

Please stop asking if I'm mad at you don't tell me I should smile more this is just the way my face naturally looks no you're not a total draining douche bag bore

Bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face
bitchy bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face

Girl you better rest that bitch face you got the bitchiest face in the hole damn place
sugar and spice and everything nice why you always look like you want to start a fight?

(Huh? He's not talking to me is he?)
(Yes he's talking to you and your)
Bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face
bitchy bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face

No I'm not upset, This is just my face
I am really happy and I love this funky place inside I'm excited though my face don't always show it
please stop asking if I'm happy and I know it
clap your hands if you're happy and you know it clap your hands then your face will surely show it if you're happy and you know it then your face will surely show it clap your hands

Bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face bitchy bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face

Bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face bitchy bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face

Bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face bitchy bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face

Bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face bitchy bitchy bitchy bitchy resting face

(Give it a rest)

 

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Floss Boss

 

Awwww yeah I got something stuck in my grill
chill I got floss!
It's 2:30!!!!!

Since I was a kid my melon was filled with dread
that my teeth would all fall out of my pretty little head
thrice on thedaily
I clean my potty mouth hole
it's the yap that I trap food in, kiss, swear, sing - blow hole

FLOSS prevent gum disease and tooth loss
FLOSS show yo teeth who is the floss boss

I want to chew my cud till my dying breath
eating hardcore food till my hardcore death
One time I couldn't find any floss to floss my teeth with
So I pulled out Penny's hair and flossed with it

FLOSS prevent gum disease and tooth loss
FLOSS show yo teeth who is the floss boss

Take the floss in your hand and wrap it around your fingers
Knock that plaque out like your ex back on Jerry Springer

I don't want to talk to you,
if your mouth smells like farts
flossing isn't easy it's a mutha flossin' art
gotta ease that thread between your teeth
and clean up and down
while curving floss around the teeth, gum line
and the crowns

FLOSS prevent gum disease and tooth loss
FLOSS show yo teeth who is the floss boss

Treat your teeth good and between your teeth better
Or you'll end up flossing under your bridge with a floss threader
or even worse now listen to your mentor
Don't be like your grandmama
and end up with Dentures!

 

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Don't Attack Me With Your Happiness

I am an artist. I'm clinically depressed,

I'm slightly neurotic and compulsively obsessed.

But I am creative, got post traumatic stress,

Have several personalities and rage that I suppress.


Don't attack me with your happiness;

I want you all to suffer for my art.

Don't rape me with your glad;

Anti-depressants are just another kind of sad.


Ex-boyfriend reunion tour: I'll fuck to shake your hand.

I'm an alcoholic drug-addicted... still my biggest fan.

I'm a schizophrenic psychopath, might kill you in your sleep.

I stalk you 'cause I love you, it just means I'm really deep.


Don't attack me with your happiness;

I want you all to suffer for my art.

Don't rape me with your glad;

Anti-depressants are just another kind of sad.


I'm a suicide threat;

I'm a drama queen;

I'm an emotional terrorist.

What can I say? I've got showbiz in my genes (in my jeans!).


I'm an entertainer,

have issues with my mother,

Have high highs and low lows,

have ADD, and also want to kill myself

but the ADD usually distracts me from…distracts me from?


Don't distract me with your happiness;

I want you all to suffer for my art.

Don't rape me with your glad;

Anti-depressants are just another kind of sad.

 

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Ben Kingsley


No one respects a slave unless he's played by Morgan Freeman,

and no one respects a Nazi unless he's played by Ray Fiennes,

and no one respects a queer unless he's played by Tom Hanks,

and no one respects an Indian or a Jew unless they're played by Ben Kingsley.


Ben Kingsley. Ben Kingsley. Ben Kingsley. Ben Kingsley.

I said that: No one respects an Indian or a Jew unless they're played by Ben Kingsley.


And no one respects a fat man unless he's played by John Goodman,

And no one respects a retard unless he's played by Leonardo DiCaprio,

And no one respects a woman...


No one respects a slave unless he's played by Morgan Freeman,

and no one respects a Nazi unless he's played by Ray Fiennes,

and no one respects a queer unless he's played by Tom Hanks,

and no one respects an Indian or a Jew unless they're played by Ben Kingsley.


And no one respects a fat man unless he's played by John Goodman,

And no one respects a retard unless he's played by Leonardo DiCaprio,

And no one respects a woman ever! So just, you know...

And no one respects an Indian or a Jew unless they're played by Ben Kingsley!

Unless they're played by Ben Kingsley! Unless they're played by Ben Kingsley!


He was Gandhi!

 

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See Something Say Something (The War On Tourism)


Hey everybody! It's terrorist season here in New York City!

Did I say "terrorist?"

Oh. Because I meant it's "tourist" season.


I was going about my day in the same old usual way

Walked 5 blocks to the G train, broken umbrella in the rain.

I waited and waited and waited and waited and wait!

What's that there?

An unattended package next to the subway stairs…


And I thought to myself:


"See something, say something"

But no one was there for me to say something to

"See something, say something"

The attendant had been replaced by a machine, so what was I to do?


I went over to the package to listen for a bomb

And sure as I am sure it was meowing like a bomb.

I knew right then and there I was going to be a hero;

I had to stop that bomb from meowing down to zero.


And I thought to myself:


"See something, say something"

But no one was there for me to say something to

"See something, say something"

The attendant had been replaced by a machine, so what was I to do?


I ran up the subway steps and out into the street.

I yelled "it's a bomb!"

The bomb hissed and peed.

I ran down to the river; the tourists were in shock and awe.

I threw that bomb in the river!

That's when I saw the tiny paw…


I saw something, I did something!

The tourists tweeted their friends about my poor decision.

I saw something, I did something!

What's one kitten in the war on tourism?

The war on terrorism?

The war on tourism!

(Meow meow meow meow!)

 

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I Turned You Gay


Waiting for the train to arrive,

I sigh and I smile and I look in your eyes.

We sit and I tell you a joke,

And you laugh and we smile while we sit and smoke

And talk about the good old times,

When pennies were nickels and nickels were dimes

And we tried to act like the end never came.

But I really couldn't get you out of my brain.


And I used to love you,

And you used to love me,

Then we didn't any more,

So we set each other free.

And it was strange

How I ran into you today

On the other side of the world.

And you told me I turned you…gay.

I TURNED YOU GAY?


You said I had turned you gay

When I peed on you in our shower,

When I picked off your scab and I ate it,

When I pooped on our scale and I weighed it.


You said I had turned you gay

When I pulled my tampon out and I threw it at you,

I hadn't shaved for 8 years,

And I had a jar of wax that I collected from my two ears.


You said I had turned you gay

When I beat you up in front of your friends.

I wouldn't wear underwear;

I would only wear Depends.

(Well, that depends.)


And I used to love you,

And you used to love me,

Then we didn't any more,

So we set each other free (like birds).

And it was strange

How I ran into you today

On the other side of the world.

And you told me I turned you…gay.

I've got a superpower!


So I put you on the train

And I said that I hoped that we could remain friends.

But you just frowned

And looked down at my Depends.


You got on the train,

You waved goodbye,

I took my jar of earwax out of my bag and let it fly at your eye.


Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye!

Goodbye!

 

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Space Invader


I understand that you can't get enough of me;

How could you ever possibly?

You text me at least 26 times a day.

When I tell you to leave you just sit, heel, stay.

I think that you think that I think it's nice

When you message MySpace from space with your "advice."

I think you think that I think that you're neat;

You're out of this world but you're kind of a freak.


We have some issues communicating.

How could you ever think that we'd be dating?

When your spaceship landed in my swimming pool

I thought you were different and kind of cool

'Til you poked and prodded me with your tool.

I told you "no probing's" my #1 rule.

Now go back to Uranus, you space stalking fool.

You space stalking fool.


What you think is foreplay I think is torture;

That's why I tried to get a restraining order.

'Cause when I told them about you

And the nights I couldn't account to

They said I was loony 'cause I went to the moony.

Just like Luke Skywalker I've got a space stalker.

You're my Darth Vader,

You're my Space Invader.


We have some issues communicating.

How could you ever think that we'd be dating?

When your spaceship landed in my swimming pool

I thought you were different and kind of cool

'Til you poked and prodded me with your tool.

I told you "no probing's" my #1 rule.

Now go back to Uranus, you space stalking fool.

You space stalking fool.

You space stalking fool!!

 

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Clone U


When it is legal

and science is finally God

I am going to Clone U.

After we try it out on our dog

and it's socially acceptable

I am going to Clone U.


'Cause one of you is not enough

To deal with me and all my stuff;

Two or more of you my dear

Would alleviate my growing fear

That you'll get going when the going gets tough.


Last night when you were sleeping

I swabbed your mouth for DNA --

I learned it on Wikipedia --

To put it in a Ziploc bag and hide it in a cool dark place:

I am going to clone ya.


'Cause one of you is not enough

To deal with me and all my stuff;

Two or more of you my dear

Would alleviate my growing fear

That you'll get going when the going gets tough.


Think of all the good times we'll have

When the other two can deal with the bad,

The breakdowns, PMS, and the SADD

When I get in fist fights and drunk dial my dad!

You know that three is company;

When one of you is dumping me,

The other two can comfort me…


I am going to Clone U

Though you are far from perfect.

I am going to Clone U;

You are my science project.

I am going to Clone U

In case you break or you get sick.

I am going to Clone U in case I accidentally kill you.

I am going to Clone U cause I-love-U!

 

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Famous Baby

I want to get down, no need to get romantic;

Let's get freaky but there's no need to get tantric.

Your GED is good enough for me, you have all your hair.

I don't need a commitment 'cause I just don't care.


Just want your baby

Gimme your baby

So I can give it to Madonna

Let's make a famous baby


Babaaayyyyyyyyyyyy!


Lick my tramp stamp, address it, and post it.

There's a party in my panties and my eggs is hostin'.

You don't need a rubber, you don't need that rhythm method;

I took a little test: ovulation detected!


Baby

Gimme your baby

So I can give it to Madonna

Let's make a famous baby


Your questionable ethnicity,

Your green card authenticity

Up the value of your sperm.

Cause the diva won't go wild

For American white child,

So I'll carry your brown baby to term.


Baby

Gimme your baby

So I can give it to Madonna

Let's make a famous baby


Like a virgin touched for the very first time

If Madonna won't take it Angelina Jolie's fine.

Calista Flockhart, you better get in line

Cause only A-list celebs can have a baby of mine.


Famous Baby!

 

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Girl Balls


You drive me crazy

Won't stop and ask for some direction, babe?

I'm not a rental, makes me mental sentimental detrimental

when you ride that way, drive that way.


You're lost and then you're found, see

Don't know your way around this body

Drunk dick, too much wine: that's the wrong hole for the very last time.

Use your Google maps 'cause your problem's not mine.


Girl balls! Girl balls!

Do you want tears or do you want to brawl?

Need a big stall for my giant girl balls.

I got girl balls

I got girl balls


I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.


You drive me crazy

Won't stop and ask for some direction, babe?

I'm not a rental, makes me mental sentimental detrimental

when you ride that way, drive that way.


You're lost and then you're found, see

Don't know your way around this body

Drunk dick, too much wine: that's the wrong hole for the very last time.

Use your Google maps 'cause your problem's not mine.


Girl balls! Girl balls!

Do you want tears or do you want to brawl?

Need a big stall for my giant girl balls.

I got girl balls, motherfuckin' girl balls!


I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.


Don't cut me off, babe,

Turn me off and give me road rage.

Keep on stalling, leave me idle lady boner suicidal

when you ride that way, ride that way


You're lost and then you're found, see

Don't know your way around this body

Drunk dick, too much wine: that's the wrong hole for the very last time.

Use your Google maps 'cause your problem's not mine.


Girl balls! Girl balls!

Do you want tears or do you want to brawl?

Need a big stall for my giant girl balls.

I got girl balls

I got girl balls


I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

I'm not your fucking GPS, bitch; find your own way.

 

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Mock Bottom


Alcohol and poor life choices

I'm drunk and I'm stoned and my sauced inner voice

is telling me to do stupid shit I wouldn't do otherwise,


Like sucking face, to second base with my best friend's mom,

Spiking the punch and flashing my tits at my neighbor's son's prom,

and killing a man in Reno just to watch him die.


I'll keep drinking 'til the baby bump shows;

I'll rock bottom

Hit an all time low.

Drink through your intervention

'Cause I'm a whore for your attention:

Johnny Walker, José Cuervo, Jack Daniels, Jim Beam.


Rock bottom! Rock bottom! Rock bottom! Rock bottom!


Smuggle liquor into my day job through my tummy,

Your walk of shame's my victory lap,

no clouds here, it's sunny.

On a scale of Lindsay Lohan to Mel Gibson

I'm a Charlie Sheen.

WIN. WINNING!


Alcohol and poor life choices

I'm drunk and I'm stoned and my sauced inner voice

is telling me to do stupid shit I wouldn't do otherwise,

I wouldn't do otherwise.

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Don't Attack Me With Your Cuntryness


I am an artist. I'm clinically depressed,

I'm slightly neurotic and compulsively obsessed.

But I am creative, got post traumatic stress,

Have several personalities and rage that I suppress.


Don't attack me with your happiness;

I want you all to suffer for my art.

Don't rape me with your glad;

Anti-depressants are just another kind of sad.


Ex-boyfriend reunion tour: I'll fuck to shake your hand.

I'm an alcoholic drug-addicted... still my biggest fan.

I'm a schizophrenic psychopath, might kill you in your sleep.

I stalk you 'cause I love you, it just means I'm really deep.


Don't attack me with your happiness;

I want you all to suffer for my art.

Don't rape me with your glad;

Anti-depressants are just another kind of sad.


I'm a suicide threat;

I'm a drama queen;

I'm an emotional terrorist.

What can I say? I've got showbiz in my genes!


I'm an entertainer,

have issues with my mother,

Have high highs and low lows,

have ADD, and also want to kill myself

but the ADD usually distracts me from…distracts me from?


Don't distract me with your cunt-ryness;

I want you all to suffer for my farm (art).

Don't rape me with your glad;

Anti-depressants are just another kind of sad.

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HYPOCHONDRIAC


I DON'T FEEL RIGHT CALL IN SICK

CAUSE I DON'T FEEL WELL

MY STOMACH ACHES I SALIVATE

WHEN I HEAR A BELL (DING DING)

AND IT TASTES LIKE CHALK AND PENNIES

YOU KNOW THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT

I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T BREATHE AND

MY CHEST IS GETTING TIGHT


OH I'M A HYPOCHONDRIAC

I THINK THAT I AM DYING

SCURVY, MANGE, EBOLA

PLEASE KNOW THAT I'M NOT LYING

MY TUMOR'S JUST TOO SMALL TO SHOW UP ON MY XRAY

SO I'LL GO BACK TO THE DOCTOR

TOMORROW, TWICE THE NEXT DAY

(ZOC DOC DOC DOC)


I WAS WATCHING DR. OZ

WHAT A POMPOUS DICK

HE SAID "NO SYMPTOMS NO DISCOMFORT

DON'T MEAN THAT YOU'RE NOT SICK"


WELL I HAVE THAT OR DO I MEAN THAT I DO NOT?

I GOT ON WEBMD AND SAW 100 THINGS I DO GOT!


SPINA BIFIDA, RICKETS, SCARLET FEVER TOO,

FLESH-EATING BACTERIA, AND ALSO THE SWINE FLU,

THE MUMPS AND THE MEASLES

THE CLAP AND THE SHINGLES

CANCER!

OH MY GOD IT'S CANCER! IT'S CANCER?!


OH I'M A HYPOCHONDRIAC

I THINK THAT I AM DYING

SCURVY, MANGE, EBOLA

PLEASE KNOW THAT I'M NOT LYING

MY TUMOR'S JUST TOO SMALL TO SHOW UP ON MY XRAY

SO I'LL GO BACK TO THE DOCTOR

TOMORROW TWICE THE NEXT DAY

(ZOC DOC DOC DOC)


YOU THINK THAT I'M CRYING WOLF? (RABIES?)

YOU THINK IT'S PARANOIA?

I BROUGHT YOU A STOOL SAMPLE

WHICH SEEMED JUST TO ANNOY YA


PLEASE TAKE MY BLOOD AND A URINE SAMPLE, TOO

WHEN I FEEL HEALTHY AND JUST FINE I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO


OH I'M A HYPOCHONDRIAC

I THINK THAT I AM DYING

SCURVY, MANGE, EBOLA

PLEASE KNOW THAT I'M NOT LYING

MY TUMOR'S JUST TOO SMALL TO SHOW UP ON MY XRAY

SO I'LL GO BACK TO THE DOCTOR

TOMORROW TWICE THE NEXT DAY


YEAH, I'M A HYPOCHONDRIAC

I TOLD YOU I WAS DYING

I'M SINGING TO YOU FROM MY GRAVE

NOW YOU KNOW THAT I WASN'T LYING

JUST BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU'RE DYING

DON'T MEAN THAT YOU ARE NOT

IT TOOK ME 90 YEARS TO DIE FROM WHAT I GOT


NATURAL CAUSES!

NATURAL CAUSES!

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GOD WANTS YOU TO CUM


No need to feel no shame

His-story is to blame

You say you've never came?

You think your lady parts are lame?

The clitoris is the only human organ

Designed Purely for your pleasure

4 inches of clit inside your body

A tiny penis that you can't measure

God made your clitoris

So special and unique

20,000 nerve endings

It's not the place you pee

But it's real close by

And it's like a tiny buzzer

Ring your bell a bit

And soon you will discover

GOD WANTS YOU TO Cum

GOD WANTS YOU TO Cum

GOD WANTS YOU TO Cum

i said

GOD WANTS YOU TO Cum

Put it in your spank bank

don't mean you're a stank skank

Diddle your fiddle

it's the GRand old Opry

pick your lima bean

row row row your boat

make your flower grow

grab your gift untie the bow

GOD WANTS YOU TO Cum

GOD WANTS YOU TO Cum

GOD WANTS YOU TO Cum

i said

GOD WANTS YOU TO Cum

 

(optional last verse)

Not there to procreate

just there to stimulate
toot toot tooty on that hooded fish whistle

she's the star of the show
if you're in the know
it's about the sweet spot and not about the hole

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ANAL FOR CHRISTMAS


You are so hard to buy for

saying you don't need nothin

It's better to give than to receive

And all you need is my lovin

You shower me with gifts

You always know just what I need

And give me whatever I want

You buy my love guaranteed

(I said-ah)You have been a good boy

You've done more than your share

Now it's time to get your freak on

Take off your snuggy and your underwear

You're mistle toe is raging

The egg nog has made me loose

For the man who has everything

My gift is better than the Christmas goose

This year I'm gonna go all out

I'm gonna give you what your heart desires

There will be Groupon for anal

Tucked in your stocking hung by the fire

with care

The reason for the season

is teasing, squeezing, a-pleasing,

that's what cold weather is fooooooooor

after santa comes down my chimney

I'm gonna use the back dooooooooooorr

You have been a good boy

You've done more than your share

It's time to get your freak on

Take off your snuggy and your underwear

I pulled your Christmas stockings down

I saved the best part for last

So, turn around and bend over

cause I'M GONNA FUCK YOU IN YOUR ASSSSSSSSSSSSS

This year I'm gonna go all out

I'm gonna give you what your heart desires

There will be Groupon for anal

Tucked in your stocking hung by the fire

with care

 

fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la

it's just what you wanted
fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
uh!
fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
it's the gift that keeps on giving!
fa-la-la-la-la-la-your back door….

This year I'm gonna go all out

I'm gonna give you what your heart desires

There will be Groupon for anal

Tucked in your stocking hung by the fire

with care

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I WANT TO BE A ROBOT


I want to be robot
so I don't have no feelings
so I can just stop caring
get fixed instead of healing

I want to be a robot
so I can save my memory
and relive every moment
but never need no therapy

Robots have all the answers
your phone is sleek and smart
it knows your every move
cause you two can't live apart
where would you be without Siri cable TV
where would you be if it didn't make your life so goddamn easy

I want to be a robot
so that human beings will trust me until it's just too late your weaknesses disgust me

If I could process pity I would just destroy this city
cause then I would be just like you and I would do the things that human beings do

Robots have all the answers
your phone is sleek and smart
it knows your every move
cause you two can't live apart
where would you be without Siri cable TV
where would you be if it didn't make your life so goddamn easy

I want to be a robot
so that human beings will trust me until it's just too late your weaknesses disgust me

If I could process pity I would just destroy this city
cause then I would be just like you and I would do the things that human beings do

Robots have all the answers
your phone is sleek and smart
it knows your every move
cause you two can't live apart
where would you be without Siri cable TV
where would you be if it didn't make your life so goddamn easy

Free thought is overrated
Free thought is overrated
Free thought is overrated
Free thought is overrated
Free thought is overrated
Free thought is overrated
Free thought is over...

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POISON


I never forget a nose
Your flaws are all that I see
One of your eyes is bigger than the other
And your teeth are stained with Chai latte tea

Look at his big saucer ears
The junk in her trunk is all flat
Look at her triple chin neck waddle
And her excessive body fat

There's a poison you can inject
To fix that you know
You can tuck your cheekbones
Under your nose
You can laser off
All the hair under your chins
And you don't have to be constantly
Sucking it in
Cause you can lipo your
Jiggle and transfer your fat
To under your eye circles
Where you need it at
Don't worry about all the ugly that's outside
It can be snipped and tucked and hidden inside

Now we are all looking perfect
And everything matches and fits
Nobody has any stretch marks
No moles, no wrinkles and no zits

Age spots and crow's feet
Are a thing of the past
Now we all look perfe
We wear super model masks
Your penis is Huge
My vagina is tight
My teeth are straight
And perfectly white

There's a poison you can inject
To fix that you know
You can tuck your cheekbones
Under your nose
You can laser off
All the hair under your chins
And you don't have to be constantly
Sucking it in
Cause you can lipo your
Jiggle and transfer your fat
To your boobs
Where you need it
you've always been flat
Don't worry about all the ugly that's outside
It can be snipped and tucked and hidden inside

Now that you can't blame
Your dimples and scars
You're forced to look inside
and see who you are
Don't you see
There's no cure for it SEE?
No miracle spot cream
And no plastic surgery
Can remove what makes
You a terrible person
For hating yourself
And calling your body a prison
Trapped inside ugly thoughts and rage
You can no longer blame
Your perfect cage

There's NO poison you can inject
to fix that you know
You can't tuck your anger
Under your woes
Can't laser off
All the mean under your skin
And you're all going to
Die of cancer from keeping it in
Cause you can't lipo your stupid
And transfer your smart
To your religion, your politics
And even your art
Don't worry about all the pretty that's outside
All you have left is the ugly inside

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